Tollie Schmidt: To My Anonymous Cyber Bully

To say you have won is an understatement. However, I am at a loss of how to stop your attacks. I feel I know a couple people who could be behind this malicious attack. However, I am not able to gather the information I need before I can try and formally press charges.

Late last night early this morning you gained access to one of several social sites I am on. You used this opportunity to not attack me but much worse. You contacted a 14 Yr Old girl struggling with Anorexia, Depression and the feeling of loss and not knowing love. The words, hate you used to absolutely humiliate, degrade, and torture this young girl is inexcusable. I received the email from her mother, since I can not monitor sites 24 hours a day. Their trust in me is gone, their daughter just had one more person fail her. I can not even try to make sense right now the damage and hate you feel is necessary to penetrate hatred on me. Why?

You have maliciously attacked myself, my family, people from my past and have caused me to lose opportunities to help and serve. You have broken the law, you have broken hearts, and you have won. I may not have all the minor details I need in order to confront you yet. However, I will not tire, I will not detour, until I see you punished to the full extend of the law.

By pure compassion for any other life please stop. The people you have referenced have cut off all contact with me, partly because of this. Yes, you won, Although I had nothing to do with any of this except bear a target I am the only visible face to this hatred and they are afraid of me. We have as of today secured our personal websites and email accounts. As for all the other sites I have had the pleasure to serve in we con only do so much.

At this point, I feel closing all these accounts is the only way to protect those I care about. This decision is still weighing heavy on my heart. I have lost a couple friends, and relationships because of your attacks and I can not see how much more damage you can inflict on myself. However, that being said since you have felt the need to attack me, consider a job well done. You felt the need to “protect” others from myself. If this is truly how you feel, I urge you to stop because you are hurting those you say you care for.

Anonymous, know this, there are at times storms we all must weather. However, in God’s grace and magnificent design the graceful beauty of a Rainbow reminds us that although the storm seems unbearable, it never lasts. At the end of any storm, light pierces the clouds, and hope is restored through compassion and love. God has built me well, I will steer my course, I will be lead with a pure heart, and I will always feel the impact. You have stopped nothing, you will never fully gain control over a destiny you can not fathom. You have cost me relationships, you have cost me opportunities, you have attacked those I promise to protect. I am not the normal guy, my heart will not turn to hate, those you have further pushed away from me, at some point will allow me back in their lives. See what you don’t understand is my fairy tales are true, they are the life anyone can hold. Yes, they are dreams, however, everyone closes their eyes at night, everyone dreams. When people have me in their life, they don’t have to wait till nightfall to close their eyes and dream. Because when others allow me in their life, they live their life as a dreamer. This is something you can not stop, this is something you can not understand. This is who I am! I am a Dreamer, I am a warrior, and I will protect those I care about.

I truly feel sorry we could not discuss this. Because I believe I got this all wrong. All the things you brought up, everything about love, It didnt dawn on me till driving back in today. So, let me just leave you with this hope. You are not your mistakes, you are not your past relationships, you are worth all the love in the world once you lose the hate and give only love. I have a feeling all these things you brought up, you have had bad relationships and you can not trust. Then you hear stories of just a few things I have done, and you can not imagine doing these things if in the end they leave.

Know, this, I would do it all over again and magnify it by 500%!! Because past feelings like the ones I felt, a true once in a life time love is worth everything and so much more. Don’t play it safe, don’t listen to all the crappy advice on how the “game” is played. Lay it all out there, you get knocked down get back up dust yourself off and show more love. It is so important, I do not regret one thing in my past relationships as far as acts or things I gave. Because, you get what you give. Love is worth it, those people who bless your life are worth it and so much more. I truly feel this is the cause of all this, I would not change one thing. I would only enhance everything I do, create a larger dream, and everyday tell those you care about what they mean. I have plenty of emails from people who have followed this little advice and their life is a fairy tale come true. I have also heard from people who never believed how quickly someone can be gone, and they never took that risk, because their reality always told them, you have time, there is always tomorrow.

I saw a great quote, let me leave you with this. Dream as if you will never die…live as if it’s your last day. If this was your last day, is this how you truly want to leave? Is there someone you have felt fear to go and show love? Would you want your last day knowing a 14yr old girl is living one more day in hell? Dream as if you will never die…Live as if it’s your LAST day!